Sorry, I Can’t Tell You That.
Privacy. It’s important in any workplace, but of paramount importance in a funeral home. I can remember one of the first things my grandfather “Pops” told me when I came to work back in 1976: “What you see here and what you hear here, STAYS here!”. Being a staff member at a funeral home causes one to be privy to all kinds of confidential items. We’ve seen families fight, checks bounce, liquor bottles placed in caskets, and tattoos in places that tattoos probably shouldn’t really be. Such tidbits would be hot topics of gossip around town, but you won’t hear them from our lips.
Not only is it unacceptable to convey to the public the aforementioned examples, but we have to be especially careful what historical information we release to visitors or telephone inquiries. Back in the “old days” our firm was more than willing to assist with genealogical searches. I’d like to have a nickel for every time we looked up an old file so that we could give out names or dates to folks who were looking for their “roots”. The family members who were searching were always grateful for any data we could “dig up” (pun intended!) about their ancestors, and it wasn’t difficult for us because we had all the info right in our archives.
All that changed ten or fifteen years ago when our corporate attorneys told us that we were not to release ANY names, dates, or places that had not been in a public obituary. Since we do not keep obits after a few years, that meant that we could not give out anything that was in our records. Such sensitive information as social security numbers, causes of death, and financial data all can be found in our decedent files. If any of that was to fall into the wrong hands, it could have horrible consequences for both family members as well as Oakey’s.
So now, when we’re asked pretty much anything by phone or in-person about a burial or cremation that we were in charge of, our response is a kind but firm “I’m sorry, but privacy laws prevent our being able to give out that information”. It’s a sad, hard fact about the times that we now find ourselves living in.
